If you are someone who is looking at moving up the corporate ladder or getting better at your business, then one of the best investments you, as an individual can make from this minute is “to work on your Emotional Intelligence”.
One of the key differentiators I do come across among the most successful individuals & people aspiring to get there is more often than not in this area.
Emotional Intelligence does have a different meaning in different contexts. However, from the perspective I am talking, it is nothing but managing your Emotions and other people around you. People management is the key aspect when it comes to dealing with your job and developing on your “Emotional Intelligence” is certain to take you far in the right direction.
Moreover, getting to know the inner game of the best C Level Executives in the industry, while doing research for my upcoming book I have heard this again & again. “Satish! All jobs involve dealing with people and people who invest in their Emotional Intelligence are more than certain to get to the top!”
The good thing about Emotional Intelligence is that it is like a muscle and the more you work on it the stronger it becomes. While coaching, I always tell this to my own clients. Working in this one area is certain to help you navigate better in your relationship with your boss, colleagues, peers, friends and family.
I do come across more and more senior leaders who need to work on their confidence, anger, become a better listener or even just show empathy towards others. All these does happen only when people begins to work on their Emotional Intelligence. Some of these areas would be
NO Human Behavior Is Unchangeable:
Most of our behaviors are ingrained while we are growing up and to a certain extent to our own genetics. However, I am more than certain that with guidance and dedication anyone can work on their long term gains realistically. How many of you have come across a grumpy coworker or a boss who is very low in his/her Emotional Intelligence?
Don’t you think that it is possible for them to change to being more open minded, considerate or even forthcoming? Everyone can get a makeover. The only thing to be asked is “Are they ready for it?”
Remember that in whatever position you are in right now as long as you are keen on taking a relook at your Emotional intelligence, no one or nothing can stop you from working on this. I always tell this in my seminars and have also shared quite a few insights about how leaders at the top needs to evolve consistently.
Once you are aware of what needs to be changed, then it is that much easier to move in the right direction either by yourself or by working with a professional coach through a coaching intervention.
Create more opportunities to Interact:
The first thing I do is to help my own clients move out of their comfort zone. I gently nudge them to incorporate more social interactions outside their workplace. You will be surprised at how many opportunities we can create in our regular day in interacting with people and doing small talk by just stepping out.
Remember, the interaction need not be a lengthy conversation. Even small 5 minute conversations will help you open up to people and I have seen that these small interactions outside office will eventually help you to connect better with people inside the workplace.
Get outside of yourself to help others:
When was the last time you did something for others, without expecting anything in return? Well if you are thinking for a long time then it’s time to get outside of yourself. Developing empathy and kindness is not something which can happen in a day.
You have to develop a passion for it and this will happen only when you look at things from a different perspective. Random acts of kindness might not cost you anything but believe me, it will help you to connect better with people and more importantly expand your Emotional Intelligence muscle.
Be in the present:
When you develop the habit of being in the present, you are giving the other person 100 % attention. You will be able to gauge their berthing, body language and with practice even what they are experiencing. While I am in a Coaching session or in an intervention I am always in the present and more often than not oblivious of the what’s happening in the environment.
This does take time but as with anything begin small and you will be able to be develop this powerful habit which will drastically influences your Emotional Intelligence.
Take a Pause & Reset:
When was the last time you did something in anger and then kicked yourself for doing something like that? We, humans are bound to give way to our emotions. However, when this thing begins to happen often then it’s time to step back and take a closer look at why and what is triggering this.
Avoiding these emotions is next to impossible in the times we live in. However, you have absolute control not to act on them.
I always highly recommend my clients to give some time out before responding in a heightened emotional state. Over the years, I have heard that things could have been better only if they had not responded immediately to a mail or a phone call while in agitated emotional imbalance.
Whenever you feel that you are about to explode emotionally and your stress levels are at the maximum, step out, take a breather or do something which will physically move you out of the physical space and take a break.
It is during these times I teach my clients to pause and do a reset on their emotions. You will be surprised to know that most will come back a different person.Once these habits are ingrained at your Sub conscious level, then you will not think before doing it the next time.
Develop a powerful habit of listening:
Listening can help you to help others better. By just giving your 100 percent attention to people and listening to them, you are enabling them to work through their own challenges on their own and figure out a solution.
When this happens there is a tremendous shift in the way a person looks at you. It’s like you are actually teaching someone to fish rather than just handing out a fish.
Empowering an individual is one of the most challenging leadership traits and a strong foundation can be laid by just listening 100 percent to the person talking to you.
Start the process of Gaining control:
As with any behavior change it all begins from taking responsibility in what’s in your absolute control. Step back and look at some of the similar situations and how you would react.
- Your boss puts the blame of the project not executed to perfection and belittle you.
- Your partner at home gets emotional and you know it’s unfair.
- A coworker is rude to you during one of the meetings.
- A driver cuts you off in the heavy traffic.
- A college or coworker who is going through a rough ride at personal front breaks down at work.
Gaining control of your emotions can happen only when you take a look at your own reactions. Two of us can face the same situation at the same time and how we do react to them depends on our Emotional Intelligence.
Practice does makes one perfect:
Let me tell you something, if you have not already realized it. It’s next to impossible to have absolute control on your emotions. However, working on the above mentioned steps will get you close to that space. Gaining absolute control over our emotions does not happen overnight. It’s always a work in progress.
However, with consistency and commitment one can get to master just about anything and so is working on your Emotional Intelligence. Once you begin to gain control over your emotions, you will be surprised how much of a difference it can do to your trajectory both in the professional and personal space.
Some of the most successful people I have come across in my own journey have understood this and use the power of emotions to work for them and not against them.
If you do feel that you have worked on most of the above areas and still do need professional help, use the link below to explore more about managing emotions which will help transform your life altogether.
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If you are an executive in an organization and are looking at “Employee Transformation” then you will be glad to hear that I do “Strategic Intervention” personally for your core team. By the end of this intervention your team will be able to
1.Work on their Emotional Intelligence and double their productivity.
2.Develop a powerful belief system.
3.Create an absolutely clear Road-map in their own Personal Transformation Journey.
You can reach out to my team by sending out a mail to the following email id email@example.com One of my team members, will be happy to reach out to you and discuss about these
which can be customized to your team & your organization goals.