When I receive a call from an unknown number in the dead of the night, I usually know someone is so desperate that they would have thrown out their logical side and called the moment they see what work I generally do with people. Well this gentleman, I realized the next day when I called back, happened to be in search of happiness and realized that he had just about everything in life but the happiness quotient was missing. This discussion made me think about what makes me happy especially in today’s environment and realized it probably might not differ too much from most of my Blog readers.
I do interact with many people across different cultures and backgrounds. Somewhere I see that many of them relate to happiness as something that will come once they achieve certain goals — a nice home, a perfect spouse, the ultimate promotion … and when they get these goals instead of being happy they often look forward to being happy when they meet their next goals. Well if this does sounds familiar then finding happiness will always be like searching for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Happiness according to me is, “something which should not wait for things to happen”. It is more of creating opportunities and possibilities in the present without altering our lives too much. I always tell people that they should take actions, to be happy in their present lives within the ambit of whatever is within our control. Somewhere down the line of my own self discovery I realized that searching for happiness is a time consuming affair. Instead of this, one can be in the present and look at doing some of the things which give me extreme satisfaction and happiness. Some of the things which you can begin to work on to hit the road of just being happy are –
Be in the present: I notice that most of the people either live in their past or will be thinking so much of their future and forget about the present. Living in both the worlds is inexplicable. Work on living in the present and making the best use of what’s there at your disposal. Living in the present is an extremely empowering habit and while it will not be easy on day one, like any other habit you will eventually be good at it. The idea is to take the first few steps and then carry on.
Focus on the good things in life: Most of us are conditioned to look at the browns and grey’s in our life .What is important here is that when we are conditioned and aware about it, then it is easy to recondition our view. Whether you’re happy or not depends largely on which aspects you focus on. Just like every cloud has a silver lining, every incident also has a positive side to it if you do look at it deeply and sometime through a different position.
Simplify your life: I did stress upon this particular topic today when I was speaking to a young dynamic group of people at a seminar. I really feel that many people make their life more complicated and hence miss the bus of true happiness. Work on simplifying your life. By simplifying your life in this way, you create time for your own happiness and reduce the stress in your life. In my own experience, living a very simple life is not beyond any body and is a pleasure in itself.
Slow down the pace: When you remove the foot of the gas pedal in a car the vehicle slows down automatically. The same logic holds good in your respective life. You do not need to press the brake pedal to slow down. On the contrary you just need to de-accelerate and things around you will look different. I happened to do this on a Sunday morning and rode my bike almost at a walking pace. The whole view changed because I noticed so many new things and relished the experience. Going slowly helps to reduce stress and improve the pleasure of doing things. It keeps you in the present moment. Work on some areas of your life where you can do things more slowly and you will write to me in no time the effect it will have on you.
I do hope will begin to work on your happiness which is not as elusive as the white crow. Happiness is always in small things and it is within each one of us to get a grip on it, nourish it and most importantly share it. As usual would love to hear from you in terms of how you have managed to find your own happiness. You can work on some of the points discussed above and share your experience on my Face book Fan Page or even mail me on coach@satishrao.in