Critics are always a part of our life. They could exist in the office, social circles or even in our own homes. Basically it is important for each one of us to learn about “how to identify critics” and move on in life.
People who can be labelled as ‘critics’ are those who at most times are negative, laugh at our dreams, chide us and say it is never possible to kick our bad habits or aspire for a better quality of life.What would have happened if some of the greatest people had followed their critic’s voice?
What is important is how one navigates our way with our critics.In my opinion critics are important since they see the situation through a telescopic vision. Some of the things you can follow to begin with when it comes to dealing with critics are –
Sniff them out in the beginning:
When people get to know about what you intend to do, they either react positively or negatively. A lot depends on their environment and their upbringing. Someone might not agree with your thoughts but that does not necessarily make them a critic.However when they are negative and doubt your willingness to go the extra mile even though you are realistic, then it is better to flag them as a potential critic.
You should avoid them or better avoid discussing your important life changing decisions with them. The thumb rule is to listen to them patiently and if they do make you feel worthless then it is time to move on.
See their point of view:
There are many times, when we are not realistic about our own actions. We might decide to book a flashy car or a bigger apartment even when we have a mountain of uncleared debt. At these times, take one step back and look at situations objectively to find the answers.
When you realise that your inner voice is strong and you can feel it deep down in your gut go for it, else it’s time to move on. When you want something very deeply then you will figure out a way to fight through any obstacles.
Insulate yourself from any negative thoughts:
Sometimes when people get to know your goals and dreams they have an uncanny habit of transforming their negative thoughts into you and planting a seed of negative doubt in your mind. This can within no time become a huge Oak tree and break your grit and determination.
The best thing here is to insulate yourself by moving on or talking to someone who is more positive. Telling yourself that you do not want to allow their negative thoughts, to enter your mind does the trick. The important thing over here is in not allowing them to overcome your thoughts in any circumstances.
Realize that there will always be critics:
No matter which part of the globe you are in, there will always be people around you who will cherish moments of putting down other people (sounds familiar right). At times we can’t change them, therefore it is wise to avoid them in the first place. However if it’s your spouse or family then it is best to listen to them, smile at them and continue what you are doing.
There is always a certain magic when you smile at some one. By not allowing their words to influence you, the critic will eventually lose interest in you. Just like the fox and the sour grapes story he/she will move on to their next unfortunate victim.
Make them your Ally:
Sometime the detractor will be your spouse or close family members. It is best to confront them, talk it out and discuss the things you are planning to do- be it relocating to another city, starting all over again or anything else which is important to you. This is best done at an early stage, so that the critic will eventually become your ally.
Sometimes by being truthful and conveying to the other person how important these goals/ideas are, you will do a world of good. They will walk with you on most occasions. The best strategy especially with spouses/family members is to make them your ally and then move on together.
Each one of us would have more than enough critics around us. How we manage them makes the difference in this journey called life. What are your own ways of managing them? Do take some time to share with me your own unique way of “Managing Critics” on my mail Id coach@satishrao.in or at my Facebook Fan page