Did you just fail at something that you gave your heart and soul at? Do you feel hurt?
All of us go through failure in our lives.
But for most of us, the psychological experience of failure inflicts deep pain in our psyche.
We lose hope… and we don’t want to give things another try.
We become cynical, doubtful of our own abilities.
We begin to look for something else that will fill the void within.
You may have probably gone through such an experience or you may be going through one such right now.
However, don’t despair.
Over the last couple of weeks and months, I have been spending my time interviewing a select group of High-End Entrepreneurs, CEOs and Business Leaders –
All of whom that have achieved the supposed ‘Pinnacle’ of human excellence and success – one of the few goals that we all strive towards.
As I interviewed them, there was one striking feature that stood out MORE than anything else. And it was:
Their reaction to failure.
Just like us, these executives too had experienced failures and setbacks in their life. In fact, they still experience failures.
However, their reaction to the failures is in complete contrast to what most normal people do.
Nearly all of them told me that when they failed, they decided to go back to the situation and give things another try. And they kept trying until they came out victorious.
The difference between these people and the normal people lies in their mindset.
The mindset, successful people adopt when they encounter failure is different from what normal people adopt.
And if you’re someone who is looking to achieve the pinnacle of human excellence, you have to change your mindset i.e. the way you think about failure.
With that said, in this article, I am going to share with you 5 powerful mindsets that the world-class Executive/Entrepreneurs use to deal with failure and how you can re-condition your mind so you can become like them…
Find The Meaning Behind Your Failure:
The natural reaction for most of us when we fail is to beat ourselves up and become cynical about our own abilities.
Otherwise, we pinpoint our finger at the external world and blame people and circumstances for our failure.
… and this is where you need to take a step back and see what you can learn from your failure. You have to understand the deeper purpose behind it.
Nearly all the business leaders that I interviewed, did not view themselves as responsible when they failed.
They acknowledged their responsibility in it – however, they regarded each failure as a learning curve.
When you regard each failure as a learning curve, it becomes easy for you to give it another shot.
And the more such shots you give, the more likely you’re going to break-through and succeed.
There’s an old saying that goes like this: “Fall down seven times, get up eight”. When things don’t go as you had planned, the ability to pick yourself up and keep on going is key.
Talk About Your Failure:
Keeping failure to yourself can be emotionally overwhelming. There’s also a certain level of guilt involved – when you know that your actions (conscious or unconscious) partly led to the failure.
The guilt can assimilate, burn you down and prevent you from giving another try.
That’s why it is important to have your own guidance system or support group, where you can talk about your failures, admit your shortcomings and focus on improving.
Most of these executives use coaches and mentor groups, where they openly admit their failures and use their support to give their best again.
As an executive or an entrepreneur, it might be difficult to share your professional/personal failures with your peer group at your workplace or your family at home. Many of them may not even understand or relate to it.
That’s why it is important to make use of coaches – coaches who can listen to you non-judgmentally and help you see past your failures.
… because when you are able to openly talk about your failures, you will learn from them and be able to grow faster,than you thought was possible.
Be Honest With Yourself:
Another problem with people is that when they experience failure or setback, they delude themselves. They say things like:
“Oh! I failed at X. That means X isn’t for me. Let me give it up altogether”
“X will never work out for me. I’d rather quit”
“See how much of effort I put in. Despite of it, I just didn’t get X. I will never get it. The world is setting me up so I never have it. Let me stop trying”.
And so on.
That’s where BRUTAL honesty is required.
… because believe me, your mind will play tricks on you. It will get you to give up the moment the first blow comes.
It requires super divine honesty to yourself to keep control and try again. Be honest with yourself.
Get to the root of your failure. Take ownership – when you realize that the cause of your failure was your actions.
Then take a deep breath and find out how you can ensure that it doesn’t happen again.
Remember The Why:
There was this corporate executive with whom I had worked couple of months ago who was sick of his crazy hours and his inability to spend time with his children as they were growing up.
On one day, seized with determination, he quit his job and started out on his own.
However, as he began on his own, things weren’t so easy.
He was hit with the first failure… and he wanted to give up and return to the cozy, comfort of his old day job.
As he was about to, that’s when he remembered the WHY.
His why – was his inability to spend time with his children and spouse. That’s the reason why he had started his business – to have freedom.
The moment he realized this, he began all-over again with determination. He refused to quit and now he runs a moderately successful business, with his own hours and lots of free-time for his children and spouse.
Remembering The Why is very important.
I often come across many people who put in their sweat, blood and tears into what they do – but they often forget the big picture.
Frequently reflecting on the bigger picture – the WHY behind why you’re doing all this – will give you the strength you need to march on regardless of failure.
Give Yourself Permission To Fail:
Another thing that I tell my clients often is to give up their race, to achieve instant success and be the most perfect beings.
Things don’t pan out the way we expect in the real world.
Just look at Mother Nature. She’s the biggest teacher for all of us. Her creation reflects that all growth comes from evolution. Nothing starts perfect.
The same is applicable for each one of us.
We don’t and cannot start off perfectly. We have to learn and evolve through the journey.
And for that, you need to be willing to embrace failure. You must be willing to fall flat on the face and get back up.
If you keep at it, you can be certain that you will come out on top and the law of averages does prove it.
If you’re an executive or entrepreneur that feels frustrated by the curve balls life throws at you and you don’t have the strength to get back up, you may want to schedule a strategy session with me.
In this quick 1 To 1 Strategy Session, we will go over what is holding you back and how you can overcome it to create the freedom and life you’ve always wanted.
If you’d like to learn more, then click the link below:
Working with a professional coach who can listen to your frustrations non-judgmentally and support you will accelerate your results.
Besides working with clients 1 on 1, I also engage with corporate teams through my Group Coaching Sessions.
Through these sessions, your team will learn to make powerful changes to their current engagement and improve performance. In my personal Intervention, I will teach them how to…
- Develop a die-hard attitude for their personal and professional lives
- Create an effective road-map to achieve their goals
- Double, triple or even quintuple their productivity
Are you an executive who’s looking to increase your team’s overall productivity? The mail me on firstname.lastname@example.org to bring in the much needed change within your team.
Thank you for reading my post. I regularly write about Leadership, Health & Wellness.