Coaching and interacting with different people across cultures, I have realized that most people are at the mercy of external circumstances. They do not realize that we cannot change our external environment to a large extent but can dig into our own resources to be our biggest hero.Working as a full time professional coach, I have seen how people’s perceptions are conceived and over a period of time they begin to believe and unfortunately live them. My job is to reverse the thought process and help my clients think differently. I make them know that by the end of the day they are in absolute control of their destiny and can choose how to behave, learn and grow. Some of the things you can also do to take control of the situation are –
Bite the bullet: Some of us just need a push, to walk through and I have experienced this many a times with my clients. What I do notice is that whatever the problem one is facing, they are too close to the problem. Yes it does look and feel menacing from up close! What I make them do is to step back and see the whole problem from a little distance to get a little disassociated from the whole issue. What we generally see as a problem is not something independent but a situation which you generally do not like. To deal with it more effectively, see it from a different angle and notice that you can take the difficulty as an opportunity to grow. This eventually makes you work on taking actions.
Focus on what you do want: Avoiding what you don’t want will take your energy away from achieving what you want. When I coach people, I always first figure out with my client as to what is that they do want and focus on that going forward. Over the years I have observed that “What you try to avoid you unconsciously create”. So it is imperative that you define a positive outcome precisely and visualize it in as much detail as possible. Ensure you do have your own milestones as to measure your own success.
Take ownership: Most of us have developed the habit of blaming others and the environment for the situation we are in. There is magic in taking ownership and taking complete responsibility. Most times, we would love to be the innocent victim. Move away from a victim mindset and focus on what you can do, to respond to your own challenge. Take the responsibility to become the hero of your story. I remember working with a client couple of years ago who blamed everything around him for his present state of emotional instability. Once he took ownership of things around him and began taking decisions to overcome them, his life turned around dramatically. Sometimes we need to remove our own chains which stop us from moving forward.
Begin with an end in mind: Set your mind on what you are ultimately trying to achieve. Once you begin with an end in the mind, our brain does begin to work towards it by following the patterns @ the sub-conscious level. Work on visualizing the complete journey in terms of creating, developing, overcoming the challenges and finally savoring the Aaha moments. It might be difficult to do this at the beginning, but if you work on this regularly, there is nothing which can stop you from doing the things you envision clearly in the mind.
Succeed beyond success: Be committed to fully achieve what you desire. There are no half measures in being a hero. Know that you deserve it and give it your best. This will most likely turn the odds for you and make you most likely to live the success. Work on pursuing your goals ethically and with absolute integrity. True success like happiness cannot be pursued but will be by-product of one’s personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself. Always listen to your inner voice or gut feelings and carry on with the best of your knowledge.
I hope that I have put across my thoughts that each one of us has the required knowledge, qualities and most importantly the Attitude to work on your biggest challenges and begin a new chapter in life. As a coach working with people, nothing can give me more satisfaction than clients who overcome these emotional barriers and ultimately reach their respective goals. Well if you know that you are up to this journey then do drop a line on my Facebook Fan Page or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and we can work on it within no time.